great advice for bicyclists

i found this website through mission mission and it has great advice for normal people (i.e. non-fixed gear bike riders).

check it:

Get a u-lock. Lock through the frame and the back wheel. Your bike will be stolen, so don't get too attached to it. This also means, don't waste your money on junk like baskets and lights. Just get a backpack.

It doesn't matter how crappy your bike looks: any bike is worth stealing for $2 worth of crack. Your bike is temporary. Accept this and move on.

vegan eggplant parmesean

So on Monday, Kevin gchats me, "Que vas a cenar? Quieres concinar?" Since it was nice and chilly out I said yes, I'll cook, think about what you want to eat. I decided it was the right temperature to enjoy something baked, and I've been meaning to try my hand at vegan eggplant parmesean, but it's always such an ordeal to do all the prep work. However, if Kevin was going to help me, that sealed the deal.

Not to be too self-aggrandizing, but it turned out perfect. I mean, it would have made my Grandma proud. And it's (99%) vegan!

Ingredients:

Sauce - in order to save time, I just bought a jarred sauce. When buying jarred sauce I exclusively purchase Italian imported sauces. Sure it'll cost an extra $5, but it's worth it. If you want to do it entirely from scratch, just make a basic marinara sauce.

Eggplant - to do a 9x11" pan, use one medium eggplant that is long and narrow (no more than 3" in diameter)

Breadcrumbs - again, I bought the pre-made kind. If you're seriously making your own breadcrumbs, good on you. I find that buying ready made breadcrumbs and then doctoring them with some Italian seasoning blend, salt & pepper does the trick. You will also need a plate of flour, a shallow bowl of soymilk, and a plate to put the breadcrumbs on.

Cheese - I made tofu basil ricotta (cut this recipe in half for a 9x11" tray), and eyeballed the ingredients, rather than measuring them. I also think I added much more olive oil than the recipe called for, but I wanted it to be nice and moist and not at all like crumbled tofu.

I also used SoySation shredded parmesean cheese. This is where the 99% vegan part comes in. SoySation has caseine, which makes the cheese melt. You can be a purist and use a 100% vegan soy cheese, but it'll taste nasty and your friends will think of your eggplant parm as "vegan" which, for me, is the worst thing ever.

Preparation:

First, slice the eggplant into 1/4" discs. Do not go any larger than 1/4". Put the eggplant in a big mixing bowl, and cover them with salt. Fill the bowl with lukewarm water and let it sit for as long as possible, but no less than 30 minutes. After about 15 minutes, drain the water, and add a new batch of salt water. Continue doing this until you can bend the eggplant between your fingers and there is no spring back. The purpose of doing this is to break down the cellulose in the eggplant and to eliminate the bitter taste and rubbery texture that makes most people think they don't like eggplant.

While the eggplant soaks, prep your tofu basil ricotta and chill until ready to use.
Fill a deep frying pan with 1/2" of vegetable oil (don't waste your olive oil on this - just use canola oil or something). Set up your plates - it should go: plate of flour, then shallow bowl of soymilk, then plate of breadcrumbs. I keep another plate handy to stack the breaded eggplant on before it's fried. See the diagram.

Pre-heat the oven to 350 degrees, and heat up the oil over medium heat. It's ready once you do a small splash of water and it bounces back. Do not start an oil fire or burn yourself, et cetera.
Once the eggplant is good to go, dip each slice in the flour - pat it down so the flour is evenly distributed. Then, dip it in the soymilk. Then dip it in the breadcrumbs and evenly coat it. Stack neatly on the prep plate. Once the oil is nice on hot, carefully set a few slices into the pan and fry on each side for a couple minutes, until the breadcrumbs are a golden blonde color. It helps if you have a partner for this part. After the eggplant is fried, set it on a cut up brown paper bag to collect the excess oil.
After you've fried all your eggplant, it's time to prep the baking pan. Lightly coat the bottom of the pan in sauce. Then, add a layer of eggplant. Cover the eggplant with the tofu basil ricotta and parmesean, and then cover that with sauce. Add another layer of eggplant & sauce and cheese. I only made two eggplant layers. Cover it all with any remaining soy cheese and cover the pan with aluminum foil.
Bake at 350 degrees for up to 30 minutes - I checked mine after 15 and the cheese was nice and melty, so I took off the aluminum foil and let it cook for another 10 minutes and it was fine. I didn’t brown the top, but if that's what you want, you can leave it in for more time, or crank up the heat for like two minutes and that should do the trick.


Take it out of the oven and let it rest for 10 minutes. Do not skip this step!

Makes 8 servings.

Ladies First

I went to Planned Parenthood today for the first time since I was in high school. (I don't have a proper medical plan and I needed birth control pills, so neveryoumind with your questions.) If you've never been, it's sort of a crazy experience. Due to the crazies who think "women's health" equals the end of civilization as we know it and are prepared to murder doctors, PP patients have to go through a system of secret access that would put Freemasons to shame. First, you have to take an elevator up to a floor that has bullet proof glass surrounding the entrance, and then you have to confirm your name and appointment time by phone in order to be buzzed in to the first set of doors. Once you're in that room, there is another layer of bullet proof glass around the reception desk. You have to write your name and appointment time (again!) on a slip of paper and slide it under an opening in the glass, sort of like a movie theatre ticket.

Then, they buzz you into a waiting room, where there is yet another reception desk window. This time it's not cloaked in bullet proof glass, but instead the floor has a strip of bright orange tape that you must stand behind until called, lest the receptionist presumably opens fire on YOU.

I was only there to speak to a clinician and get my pills - I didn't need an exam - but I had to fill out something like eight pages of paperwork. Those folks over at PP are thorough - in addition to all of my medical info (which included the date of my first period and the age at which I first had sex, as well as whether anyone in my family ever had cataracts) I had to fill out a domestic violence questionaire. I contemplated pretending like Nate & Kevin were beating me up, but really, who would ever think that was actually, you know, funny? I also could have registered to vote while I was there.

Since I'm gainfully employed and not a member of a "special needs" group (i.e. homeless, transgendered, drug addict, and something else. maybe minors?), I had to pay the full rate, which was a whopping $56 plus the cost of pills ($22/pack for name brand!). God bless Planned Parenthood.

My first experience at PP was in high school. The clinic was located in a strip mall where the only other thing open was a bowling alley. I don't remember the security being that strict, despite Buffalo's history of welcoming Operation Rescue with open arms. I do remember having to fill out even more paperwork (possibly because I was a minor) and being worried that I would run into someone I knew. I was there for my first ever regular exam, and I didn't want to have to talk to my mother about it, at all, under any circumstances. The doctor was very nice and helpful - I distinctly remember her warming the speculum up under a stream of hot water - and I think it was when she was pressing on my ovaries that I realized she was my English teacher's wife (and friend's mom!). So that was an awkward moment. She assured me all matters were kept confidential, and I only felt a twinge of freaked-outedness when she shook my father's hand at graduation.

When I left that day (at PP, not graduation), I think I had to pay something like $8 for the whole shebang, and I asked for some condoms on my way out. The receptionist took out a strip of Trojans, and put them in a bag. Then, she took a second look at me, and put in about more five handfuls. I counted when I got home - she had put 32 condoms in the bag for me! What did she think I was made of? Those condoms lasted well into my sophomore year of college!

Related, from Marla: Women's Lib Arrived on Bicycles

bay to breakers

and a sweet flickr set is here.

some people say i done alright for a girl

my other new tattoo

money changes everything

okay, so a decision has been made: i am moving back to new york. whaaaa? why! well, my company has made me a very generous offer, which includes the cost of relocation and an interim raise. an offer i could not refuse. i'm flattered that they think highly enough of me to want me back, after i up and left for california on a whim. i love love love it out here, and i love my new place and my roomies, and trust me, i'll be back often to visit. but opportunities like this don't happen often and i'd be a fool to pass it up, even if it means a life time of mediocre burritos.

the best news is that i negotiated it so i won't have to go back before the end of the summer. so that's, like, three and a half months. if you were thinking about coming to visit, now's the time to do it. and if you were taking for granted our limitless opportunities to hang out, now's the time to get to it!

(also, i will be visiting nyc for the mermaid parade, and hopefully will be going to argentina for a week or so in august, but other than that, i'm around.)

how i operate

Most of you who know me in 3-D know that I skipped a grade - it was kindergarten, and it was the result of me "promoting" myself by sitting in the back of a first grade classroom. But it wasn't that simple. After convincing the school officials that it just might be a good idea, I had to go through a whole rigmarole of tests - IQ test, personality tests, psych evaluations, et cetera. But the final thing was sitting down with Dr. Peterson and filling out a "pros and cons" list to ensure that I was making an informed decision. And, to this day, it's pretty much how I've made every single important decision in my life, except for going to law school, which I gave zero forethought.

But now, I find myself in a place where I have to make yet another list. And yes, as you might guess, it concerns New York versus California, and work, and essentially what I want my future to look like. If you want details, email me personally. Otherwise stay tuned for an update after I've made my decision.

hostess with the mostess

past performance is not a predictor of future results, as they say in the law biz, but here's a sampling of what to expect if you come visit me.

the red headed terror herself, one miss jaime fallon, flew in on thursday afternoon and left sunday afternoon. in no particular order, we managed to accomplish the following:

> ate mission burritos and tacos times ten
> and ate vegan brunches
> made dinner at home and fed four hungry boys
> ate a vegan japanese buddhist restaurant
> got tattoos (see below)
> took a cable car ride
> walked down lombard street
> danced to 80's music
> danced to punk-metal-hardcore, with some smiths thrown in for good measure
> watched people in dolores park
> took a walking tour of the mission
> played with a baby
> bought cute jewelry made by local artists
> earned our cougar stripes
> listened to a whole lot of dance music at home
> napped
> called the police in regard to the crack head blazing up, crouched behind the suv parked across the street from my bedroom (okay, maybe this isn't something to look forward to)
> went bar hopping in the mission (steer clear of the elbo room on a friday night, just a tip)

i miss her face already. super fun times.

pics!


more pics here.

it's official

new tattoo!

there will be a longer, photo-y post soon enough, but in the meantime, please enjoy images of what it looks like when a tattoo hurts so bad you grab the tattooist's leg.


and also, what it looks like when you have to swab up the blood after you bust your lip open because jaime fallon makes you laugh so hard that you throw your head in delight, right into a wooden counter top.

my new favorite website

xkcd

fun fun fun

sorry for the dearth of updates. this past weekend was superfuntimes. went shopping with my new work best friend and got cute new shoes and a new dress on friday. saturday i chilled in dolores park with the boys and then got my bike fixed for a mere $58! i highly recommend box dog bikes if you're in SF and need a good bike shop. super nice friendly guys. also, had my bike measured, and it turns out i must be a medical midget because my frame is a tiny 45cm! saturday night i went dancing at annie's social club with markasaurus and ended the night at my roommate kevin's monthly party at julie's supper club.

sunday we hosted a (mostly vegan) cinco cuatro de mayo brunch and invited all our cool friends. i sort of went insane and spent most of the morning in the kitchen preparing the following:

soy chorizo hash
soyrizo, diced potatoes, roasted red bell peppers & jalapenos, diced tomatoes
boil diced potatoes for a few minutes until tender
sautee all other ingredients over medium heat
add potatoes and cook until warm

homefries
sliced potatoes, sliced onion, diced fresh red bell pepper
adobo, black pepper, cayenne pepper
earth balance buttery stick
olive oil

to make a large pan full of homefries, use one onion and about 10 potatoes. heat 2/3 of a buttery stick and a tablespoon of olive oil and add onions. sautee until the onions start to get soft. add peppers and potatoes and cook over medium heat, stirring frequently for about 40 minutes or so.

scrambled eggs, cinco de mayo style*
whisk together eggs, milk, chopped tomatoes, chopped cilantro, adobo and pepper (and cayenne pepper if desired). melt a thick pat of butter over medium heat & add eggs. scramble.
(*not vegan)

beans
three cans of red kidney beans
one medium onion, diced
3-5 cloves of garlic, smashed & chopped
one roasted green bell pepper, cut into strips, and then cut in half
adobo, black pepper, cayenne pepper
olive oil

sautee garlic & onion, and season it
add roasted bell pepper
rinse beans & add them
fill pot with water (or veg broth) just to barely cover the beans & bring to a boil
season some more
reduce heat and simmer for 30 mins or more, but monitor to make sure beans don't turn to mush


cabbage salad
shredded cabbage, shredded carrot, lemon juice & olive oil. toss.

fruit salad
melon, mango, pineapple, strawberries & banana.
chop, toss

mango salsa
one diced mango
one half diced vadalia onion
one finely chopped habanero pepper
cilantro
salt
lime juice
mix 'em up.

avocado slices, corn tortillas and chips

margaritas
2 parts tequila, one part triple sec, one part fresh squeezed lime juice, and a splash of fresh squeezed OJ.
shake & pour over ice.

bloody marias
1 part tequila, 2 parts tomato juice, juice of one lime. add horseradish, vegan worcestershire sauce, chopped cilantro, and tapatio hot sauce to taste.

shake & pour over ice.

the rest of the pics are here.

i want this

and YOU should buy it for me.

girls medium, light blue.

pics

the boys at dolores park

this was thai dinner night. oh, aren't we the picture of laughing happiness?

our neighbor, "neighbor james"

the rest of the pics are here.

awesomeness

watch it before youtube takes it down.

insult to injury

i found another grey hair last night. this makes three.

calamity jane

i love my new roomies. tonight we made fresh spring rolls and vegetable red curry, and it was super awesome. pics to come.

in other news, i got hit by a fucking car today on my way home from work. yes, i'm fine, save for a few bruises and a shaken demeanor, but it sucked and was super scary. it was bound to happen sooner or later, and as accidents go, i sort of lucked out, knock on wood. the guy who hit me was really nice, and pulled over and got out of his car to make sure i was okay, and put my chain back on for me. i was totally disoriented and sort of discombobulated from the whole thing and for a second there couldn't remember how to get home. but i made it, and it's nothing a couple tecates and a few advil won't fix.


tomorrow i have to take mazzy to the vet yet again due to what appears to be another food allergy. poor girl.

O Valencia!

the boys.

sorry for the dearth of updates - things have been crazy -- after my dad's visit, pretty much every day was packed with things related to moving day. but now i'm fully relocated into san francisco proper, no more of this oakland east bay shite.

my new place is in the mission, and my diet now almost exclusively consists of one dollar twenty five cent bean and rice tacos and canned tecates. to put it mildly, i am in heaven.

as previously mentioned, my roommates are these amazingly adorable twenty five year old boys - total sweethearts with shockingly agreeable personalities. granted, we're still in the honeymoon phase of our relationship, but i couldn't be happier. they love my cats, and in their usual way, my cats have selected their favorites. mazzy loves loves loves playtime with nate, and xander is all about snuggling with and getting petted by kevin. i just let them out into the rest of the house last night and they both beelined it for nate's closet, which is really just a heap of clothes with doors. the perfect place for afternoon cat naps.

there are a few, um, quirks. like the shower faucet handle that falls off pretty much every time i turn it, and the sticky film lining the kitchen floor (which appears never to have been washed). their previous roommate, my predecessor as it were, left some random objects in the kitched cupboards and drawers, including, but not limited to: a record with no sleeve, a red washcloth (all by itself in a drawer), a stack of those naked lady porno trading cards you see all over the place in Las Vegas, and not one but three frighteningly crusty towels. so in addition to getting my room all set up, organizing and cleaning the kitchen is my next big project.

speaking of my room, the boys had an extra mattress which i thought would work nicely as a makeshift boxspring, as i have one of those ikea beds that just sets on slats. after the boys drew on the mattress, rendering a sharpie outline implying that they were having sex on it (hard to explain; pics tk), we put it under my mattress, which had the unintended effect of creating the biggest bestest princess bed ever. given that my bedding is pink, it now looks like a giant pink marshmallow bed that i have to take a flying leap to get on to. needless to say, once everything else is in order, the gay sex mattress is getting curbed.

so yeah, things are awesome. come visit!